AMERICAN ECONOMIC POLICY

HOW TO SURVIVE ECONOMIC CRISES

Mulla Nasruddin Jokes

The ticket collector comes, and Mulla Nasruddin looks into everything -- his bags, his pockets. The ticket collector is standing there and he says, "You have looked in every pocket, but you don't look in the left-side pocket of your coat."
Mulla Nasruddin said, "Don't interfere in my work. Never mention that pocket!"

He said, "You are strange. I am simply helping you because you cannot find the ticket. Perhaps... why are you leaving out that pocket?"
Mulla Nasruddin said, "That is my only hope. If the ticket is not in the left pocket, I am finished. So first I will look into everything else. Only as the last resort may I touch that pocket. That is my last hope, don't destroy it."

Mulla Nasruddin Jokes

Mulla Nasruddin's wife drags him to a movie house. And in the picture which is shown the hero hugs and kisses the heroine so gracefully, so sweetly, that immediately Mulla Nasruddin's wife turns to him and says, "You never do that to me."

Mulla Nasruddin said, "You don't understand -- he is paid. Am I paid?"

But the wife was also a rare personality. She said, "Paid or not paid, you don't know that in real life also they are husband and wife."

Mulla said, "My god! If in real life also they are husband and wife, then he is a great actor. I can certify that he is a great actor."

osho jokes

Swami Deva Coconut

Comrade Gorbachev has heard rumors that his policies are being discussed in Poona, India, so he decides to go and check it out. When his plane arrives at Poona airport, the Indian Army is there to welcome him. As Gorbachev steps off the plane, the military guard of honor fires off the traditional twenty-one gun salute.

"What were those shots?" asks Swami Deva Coconut, standing in the crowd.
"Gorbachev has arrived!" says the man next to him.

"Really?" replies Coconut. "You mean they could not get him with just one shot?"

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osho jokes

Swami Deva Coconut arrives in Bombay airport with his pet parrot on his shoulder. He is intercepted by an Indian customs official who says, "Hey, stop! You have got to pay import duty on that parrot!"

"How much?" asks Coconut.
"Let me see," says the official, paging through his imports book. "Here we are," he continues. "Five hundred rupees for an alive parrot, one hundred rupees for a stuffed one."

"Hey, Coconut" screams the parrot. "Don't get any crazy ideas!"

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Swami Deva Coconut 

Bernie Bush, the ace political reporter for the American Righteous News, is having a day off with his family at the zoo. They are walking by the lions' cage, when Bernie notices a young boy reaching his hands through the bars to pet one of the lions. Another huge lion suddenly leaps forward with a tremendous roar, but at the last second, the boy is swept to safety by a man in the crowd.

Spotting a sensational story, Bernie approaches the man and says, "Excuse me, sir, but that was an incredible display of instant courage. I want to write a story about you for my newspaper. Tell me, where do you get such courage?"

"Simple," Swami Deva Coconut said, "I'm a disciple of Osho Rajneesh."

"What?" shouts the right-wing reporter, turning and walking away, "This will make a real story for sure!"

The following day, the headline of the American Righteous News reads: "Rajneesh Disciple Snatches Lunch From Hungry African Immigrant!"